SAY IT AIN’T SOSA – The New York Times recently reported that former National League MVP Sammy Sosa failed a drug test in 2003. Surprise! I’ve never failed a drug test before… but I’m pretty sure my employer wouldn’t wait six years to tell me that I had. Sosa’s name was on the same infamous, and supposedly anonymous, list of 104 names that also outed Alex Rodriguez. Sosa allegedly told reporters in perfect English that he still looks forward to his Hall of Fame induction.
FAVRE FROM RETIRED – In an HBO interview, Brett Favre once again graced viewers with a “Maybe” when asked whether he would play next season. ESPN reported that the Minnesota Vikings sent a team trainer to Mississippi to check on Favre’s health after recent shoulder surgery. What’s a little plane fare when compared to the future of your franchise? Vikings fans are probably more excited about screwing over Packer faithful than they are looking forward to winning a Super Bowl.
DONTE PUT AWAY (FOR A MONTH) – Donte Stallworth was sentenced to 30 days in jail after pleading guilty to DUI manslaughter stemming from an horrific incident where he struck and killed a pedestrian earlier this year. Stallworth faces a lifetime drivers license suspension and must perform 1,000 hours of community service. An undisclosed financial settlement was reached with the family of the deceased. Anyone else in the room think he got off light?
FREE HEDO – One day after the Orlando Magic lost the NBA Finals, small forward Hedo Turkoglu announced he would test the free agent market. This move was as surprising as the failed Sosa drug test and another Favre comeback. The most surprising news came when the Magic announced they were willing to pay the luxury tax to keep Turkoglu on their roster.
SMOLTZY TAKES THE MOUND – The Boston Red Sox announced that former Atlanta Brave and Cy Young Award winner, John Smoltz, is ready to pitch and will take the mound on June 25. He is poised to join an already dominant staff. Smoltz told management he’d either start or come out of the bullpen, whatever the team needed. Refreshing, huh?
STREAKIES – The Colorado Rockies have just run off an eleven-game winning streak, besting Houston, St Louis, Milwaukee and Seattle over that stretch. Then they invited the Tampa Bay Rays to Colorado. Apparently the skiing in Denver is as fine as the thin air as the Rays knocked in 12 runs on 17 hits to end the Rockies winning streak.
TIGA WOO– The US Open begins this Thursday at BethPage Black in Farmingdale, NY. Not only is Tiger Woods the defending champion but he also won the Open the last time it was played on this course (2002). He is a significant favorite to win at just under 2:1. Phil Mickelson is a distant second at 14:1. Tiger hit 18 of 18 fairways two weeks ago, but at those skewed odds, if you’re a gambling man, it might be wise to pick someone else in the field if you’re looking to make any money.
FUTURE MUPPETS? – Rumors abound that the Cleveland Cavaliers will look to trade for Shaquille O’Neal in the off-season. Cleveland is reportedly offering Sasha Pavlovic and the possibly retiring Ben Wallace in exchange for the Big Cactus, but the Cavs are more interested in acquiring Delonte West. Any disagreement could cause a snag in the trade although Phoenix GM Steve Kerr has been known to make bad decisions in the past.
A.L. BEAST – For those of you interested in the best division in baseball, the Red Sox currently lead the New York Yankees by two games, with the Rays and Jays closely sniffing their behinds. All four teams are over .500.