We’ve been known to get a little sophomoric from time to time here at Sportschump.net like the day we did this…. or the day we did this, so why not continue the trend?
Saturday night, the Seattle Mariners sent starting pitcher Charlie Furbush to the mound. Charlie Furbush. There have been porn star names with more tact. Let’s just say, on a slow night at work, it was difficult for my co-workers and I to contain the one-liners. I mean, there have been plenty of major leaguers with names that refer to a particular part of the female anatomy. Rusty Kuntz first comes to mind.
I know we’re all adults here (well, some of us) but how can one not poke a little fun (pun intended) at possibly the most humorous, current surname in sports, and furthermore, how is his not the top-selling jersey in the greater Seattle area?
Let’s say we lived in a more, immature world where innuendo ran amok. Saturday’s recap might have gone a little something like this:
St. Petersburg, Fla. – Saturday night was a rough one for Furbush.
Furbush was used up pretty good early on and was eventually unable to continue. On just another Saturday night in the Bay area, the Rays lineup proved a little too strong for Furbush. Furbush was sent to the showers after three, and saw red after being pulled by his manager. The Rays were eating up Furbush all night long.
Furbush was wild and not in opposing hitters’ faces like in the past. The Rays took advantage when they could, really knocking the boots off of Furbush. Furbush failed to show up with quality stuff and simply couldn’t shave off anything.
After such a rough outing, the Mariners may end up cutting Furbush.
Furbush is still fresh in the major leagues, but after last night, Furbush might find it difficult to find a comfortable home in someone’s rotation.