LSU, the BCS and some helpful hints to determine our national champion
November 21st, 2011 by Chris Humpherys
With LSU remaining undefeated this weekend, and every other school fighting fruitlessly for position like presidential candidates at the Republican National Convention, the debate rages on over who should play the Tigers for college football’s national championship.
Previously undefeated Oklahoma State was the clear-cut winner until they lost to Iowa State Friday night. Oregon also had a shot, but lost at home to USC. Oklahoma would have been considered yet they lost to Baylor. There was even talk of Clemson getting the nod but alas, they lost this weekend as well.
What we have here, other than a failure to communicate, are three college football programs within the same division – LSU, Alabama, and Arkansas – ranked one, two and three for the first time in BCS, if not college football, history.
Of course, the season is not over yet. LSU still has to play Arkansas this Saturday. Assuming they beat the Razorbacks (which is no safe assumption, after all… it is college football), they’ll have to play Georgia in the SEC championship game. Two more wins and they’re in. A loss, however, would really screw things up.
With all other contenders falling flat on their faces, and many college football fans opposed to an LSU-Alabama rematch, I thought I’d offer some helpful solutions on how to remedy this year’s college football madness.
Form an all-star team comprised of all one and two-loss schools and have them play LSU for the title
Have LSU play the Colts, only with Andrew Luck as Indy’s starting quarterback
Have LSU play Tim Tebow… by himself! Nah, that’d be unfair.
Fly in the 1972 Dolphins or 1986 Bears and have them give LSU a shot
All in the same day, have LSU play one quarter, Diggstown-style, against the remaining teams in the top ten. Appoint James Woods and Lou Gossett, Jr. honorary bowl co-chairmen.
Grant Alabama a rematch. If they beat LSU, declare the Crimson Tide your national champion even though they couldn’t beat them in Tuscaloosa earlier this season, or better yet, have Bud Selig declare the season a tie.
Give undefeated Casey Keenum and the non-BCS conference Houston Cougars a shot at the Tigers. Have Houston pay a cover charge just to be in the game
Schedule LSU to tour the nation playing the Harlem Globetrotters
Kidnap Les Miles for the day and see if the Tigers can win without their grass-eating, head coach
Simply declare LSU your national championship and not even play the game. Save billions of dollars on worthless advertising
Or how about this for a novel concept… INSTITUTE A PLAYOFF SYSTEM!!!