A Jason Dufner PGA Championship/goose-inspired caption contest

Dufner and wife kiss trophy after pgaVery few men have ever won a PGA Championship.

Even fewer have grabbed their wife’s ass for millions to see immediately after doing so.  Suddenly, Jason Dufner has become my new favorite golfer.

Dufner along with Keegan Bradley, Webb Simpson and Bubba Watson have now all won major championships, meaning the future of American golf is in good hands.  So, apparently, is the rear end of Jason Dufner’s wife.

After shooting a final round 68, and an even more impressive second round 63, Dufner coasted to victory at Oak Hill Country Club this weekend.  The characteristically stoic Dufner showed little emotion after sinking his final putt and capping off what had to be the highlight of his career: winning the season’s final major.  While others laugh, cry and embrace their loved ones after such a moment, Dufner’s celebration was as steady as his golf game.

That was until his wife greeted him on the 18th green.  Dufner’s response?  A nice, firm pat on the rear end.  You can take the kid out of Alabama.

So to honor Jason Dufner’s first major championship and his wife’s perfectly round derriere, I thought I’d host a little caption contest in their honor.  The winner of this week’s caption contest will receive one golf lesson from yours truly (non-refundable) and a complimentary pat on the rear after said lesson is over.*

*pat on rear also non-refundable

 

Dufner pats wifes ass

27 thoughts on “A Jason Dufner PGA Championship/goose-inspired caption contest

  1. Pingback: A Jason Dufner PGA Championship/goose-inspired caption contest - BallHyped Blog Network, Golf | BallHyped Sports Blogs

  2. Does the winner have to wear a white, mid-thigh dress during said lesson? I’m partial to green myself…

    Hmmm, best line… What’ll you let me do if I win the Masters?

  3. Ahhhhh, what better to go with a pinch between your cheek and gum than a pat on the cheek and bum.

  4. Dwin…

    After seeing Dufner’s wife on 18, it’s safe to say he’s fighting outside his playing weight.

    And I thought playing guitar got ya’ girls.

  5. In times like these I like to refer to the most interesting man in the world.

    “I don’t always grab ass in public, but when I do. I do it like Dufner. Stay thirsty my friends.”

  6. Dufner was promised something if he won . So he got his reward .

    Now let`s see , it`s now eighteen and counting Slam (Majors tournaments [just over a four-year span]) that is , that Tiger has not even been really close to winning in the true sense of the word . Has Lindsay Vonn put a crimp in his game or is she aiding him in some way ?

  7. You’re right Chris, Jason Dufner becomes the “man” to us too. Not only does he win the PGA Championship, he has a drop-dead gorgeous wife to go along with it. Not bad at all.

  8. Chris

    Do you believe that Jason Dufner has the game to win multiple Grand Slam titles ? Or will he be much like several other recent American winners of a Slam tournament over the past few seasons just be a one and done type of player ?

    Dropped this NFL piece .

    Push or pull ?

    Another Rays` loss ? Like I said, this is a team that is quite capable of and fine with digging its own grave without anyone else piling on the dirt over their coffin .

    tophatal …………..

  9. Al…

    Who knows what’s wrong with Tiger when he comes to majors these days. He’s been pressing because he’s been nowhere close when it matters most.

    This’ll be an interesting off-season for him. He needs to come back focused as his clock is starting to tick.

  10. Al…

    Not sure about Dufner. He’s already 36 years old BUT he’s been playing some wicked golf the last few years. Almost half his career earnings, $7 mil or so, have come in 2012 and 2013.

    There’s no shame in only winning one major. Just ask Jim Furyk who still can’t seem to win that second.

  11. That is Kentucky Bob…heavyd has a clean slate from sexual offenses. Oh and I think dufner will win more than one major.

  12. Chris

    Tiger`s been using his other iron (9“) way too much, to satisfy Lindsay Vonn . That may well have hurt his game don`t you think ? LOL,LOL ,LOL !!!

    Atop of the Fedex Cup rankings , Tiger Woods is likely to take the overall title by simply placing once , in the top ten in any of the four remaining tournaments . And the $10 million payday that comes along with that , might well make him feel at ease , at the end of the year .

    Broncos` defensive player Vonn Miller. What sort of excuse can he use to successfully appeal a mandatory four game suspension for violating the league`s substance policy rule ? Did he actually inhale or not exhale enough weed to get it completely out of his system ? Miller denies categorically that he used a banned substance but asked if he is a casual user of marijuana . Well, let`s just say the player was somewhat noncommittal ?

    The Rays are 3-7 in their last ten games and barely squeaked by the Mariners yesterday. Are they intent on self-imploding and failing to make the postseason ?

    tophatal ………..

  13. Chris

    Still of the opinion that due process is rightfully due to Alex Rodriguez in light of the latest allegations as revealed by CBS news program `60 Minutes` and Yahoo Sports ?

    The player`s appeal is not liable to take place until after the postseason (early November) . And if arbitrator Frederic Horowitz finds in favor of MLB . Do you not feel that teams have the right to perhaps question why the league hierarchy did not expedite an earlier hearing ?

    I know that even you are not that naive but c`mon man, due process for someone who repeatedly lies and simply doesn`t know t he meaning of the word `honesty ` ?

    Will Revis Island ever suit up at all for the Buccaneers during the preseason ?

    tophatal …………

  14. Al…

    I’ll have my take up on Revis soon.

    I wonder if the Von Miller distractions will leak into the regular season.

    And Tiger will make the Ryder Cup team I’m sure. I just wonder if he’s going to be worth a damn. He rarely is in that match play.

  15. Chris

    The only match play Tiger likes , are ones of intimacy , where he matches himself up against a female opponent .

    Revis Island make a return and it still might not be enough as far as the Bucs are concerned .

    Vonn Miller ……… arrested for failure to show up to court for a traffic accident hearing . Dumb , yes ! Miller also failed a drug test in his rookie season . So why would anyone now take him at his word, when he says he did not test positive for a banned substance ?

    Dropped this piece .

    People who live in glass houses

  16. Damn. And they say money can’t buy love…My ass.

    Dude looks like Rex Ryan’s kid and he’s getting a handful of that tight little thing?

    FORE!

  17. Bleed…

    Ever been to Alabama? Girls look like that there.

    Get a girl like that to work for the visitor’s bureau and instantly you’ll triple your amount of vacationers.

    Hey, what can I say? I’m a forward thinker.

  18. Enjoyed the read mostly because Ms. Dufner is a complete BABE and she didn’t swat his hand away. The combination escalates this couple into “watchable”.

    Strongly suggest your create a “rambling about” thread so that poor tophatal has somewhere to go to wander off topic. This thread was about Ms. Dufner IMO and not Tiger or Lindsay or MLB doping or Revis or the Rays or any of those other ADD saturated issues…

    Arrrrrrggggghh…

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