Bad Buccaneers, Bad!

Wow, that was tough to watch.

Camalicious

I’ve been to bad movies before and walked out of the theater without so much as asking for my popcorn money back.

I’ve eaten bad meals at restaurants and not complained to the chef or server.

I’ve even been on bad dates before and not put out.  (Just kidding, of course I did.)

But Thursday night’s Carolina Panthers-Tampa Bay Buccaneers debacle was as unwatchable as well… just imagine the most unwatchable thing you’ve ever seen in your life (the new Michael J. Fox series comes to mind) and put this atop your list.  This game was horrifically bad, and just in time for Halloween.  Fortunately, most of the fans in the stadium weren’t paying attention.

The Buccaneers lost 31-13 and it wasn’t even THAT close.

I saw dropped balls, passes that hit wide receivers right on their fingertips, only to hit the turf shortly thereafter.  I saw other passes that landed nowhere near their intended target.  I saw missed assignments.  I saw fumbled snaps.  I saw disinterested fans.  I saw empty seats.  I saw billboards and t-shirts demanding the head coach get fired.  I entered a men’s room to relieve myself from too many beers, that weren’t doing nearly enough to distract me from the game at hand, without hearing a single drunken hoot, holler, or Go Team.  Only silence… and the ironic sounds of another season flushed down the drain.

I saw fans with paper bags over their heads.  I heard cannons shot from a faux pirate ship that celebrated their team reaching the red zone.  Honestly, isn’t it about time the Buccaneers set their sights a little higher?  Or is it that they have all that extra gunpowder in house and no reason to fire it?

Fire SchianoThis is a franchise with a proud history, Hall Of Famers, a Super Bowl victory and dare I say enough talent on the field to be competitive, although the way they’re playing these days, it’s difficult to tell.  We are not the Jacksonville Jaguars… or are we?

There is so much blame going around town, from ownership, to management, to coaching staff, to players to fans, and all of it appropriately so.  Face it, they all suck.  The only people that can’t be blamed are the sales force for convincing people to invest in such an atrocious product and the beer concessionaires who are grateful just to see people in line.

Three days ago, Josh Freeman’s meager Minnesota Monday night meltdown gave Bucs fans something to smile about, if only for a moment.  The former Buc ended up having the last laugh, knowing he was safely miles away – exiled, if you will – from what another ex-teammate recently referred to as “playing in Cuba.”  For the record, he wasn’t referring to the sunshiny, art deco, Ricky Ricardo Cuba either.  In all fairness to the dinosaur dictator, not even Castro’s Cuba was this bad.  At least his citizenry could read a playbook.

depressed schianoThe 2013 Tampa Bay Buccaneers exist in a vacuum with no leadership, far too many questions and not even a shimmer of light at the end of their dark, empty tunnel.  I can’t even imagine what’s going on in that locker room.

Nobody knows whose head will be the next to fall.  Schiano’s?  Dominik’s?  The entire coaching staff or front office?  Or will the team just pick up and move entirely?

Scoff at that thought all you want, Buccaneers fans.  This is the first time in three seasons you’ve bought enough tickets to even partially fill the stadium (couldn’t tell by tonight’s attendance) and this team has given you no reason to reinvest next year.

There are other fan bases that will.  I just hope they know what they’re getting themselves into.

And so, your Tampa Bay Buccaneers move to 0-7.  Don’t be shocked if another move follows soon afterwards.

27 thoughts on “Bad Buccaneers, Bad!

  1. Pingback: Bad Buccaneers, Bad! - BallHyped Blog Network, NFL | BallHyped Sports Blogs

  2. Interesting thoughts although a bit harsh……..You see the owners of the Bucs in history have never fired a head coachin the middle of a season so getting rid of the coach is probably not going to happen. With that being said Chris Humpherys, You used some very interestingly large words in this article and you articulated your thoughts so nicely. Might I say nicely done….Oh……before I go (looking around the room), does anyone know what time it is?????

  3. Just like I was telling you. Hope you took the flask. Schiano gets the boot by the weekend?

  4. Chris

    As I asked in your last post , what gave you the impression the Tampa Bay Buccaneers were simply good enough to beat the Panthers ? All season long this team has been rudderless in terms of leadership both on and off the field of r play . And now, all the feint- hearted fans are being given are the cursory excuses from the players as well as the head coach . Needless to say , the Bucs are back to ways of old and all the optimism in the world cannot hide the fact that the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are a damn awful team . Their stats and play this season simply bears this out beyond their standing in the division and NFC as a whole . Need I add anything else at this juncture as I would hate to pile on even more fecal matter than there already is concerning the team ? LOL,LOL ,LOL !!!

    Great comeback win for the St Louis Cardinals .. last night and it now makes the series all the more interesting .

    I see Greg Oden in an interview with a columnist from USA Today has been talking about his hopes for the season along with that of playing for the Miami Heat . Any chance that we see Oden be a participant in more than 55 games this season for the Heat ?

    tophatal ……………..

  5. Remember the practices Schiano set up with Bill Belichick? Going in Greg made it a point to tell the Buccaneer players to pay close attention to whatever Belichick uttered, like he is, in Schiano’s eyes, a football God or something. The word is that is the point where Schiano lost the team.

    You know I believe that lousy NFL teams are the product of lousy ownership and it flows downhill from there. Good, attentive owners spawn good teams. I am a 49er fan from way back when they played in Kezar Park and it wasn’t until Eddie DeBartolo bought the team that things finally changed for the better. I know you can always point out exceptions (Jerry Jones won 3 SB’s not long after he purchased the Dallas Cowpokes, but if you paid attention you noticed that once Jimmy Johnson’s influence was eliminated and the meddling began, the pokes have been poked…) For the good of all Tampa Bay Buccaneer fans the Glazer family needs to sell out while the selling’s good!

  6. Angel…

    First of all, welcome off the karaoke stage and onto the website.

    A bit harsh, huh? I thought I was being kind.

    You did watch the game last night, didn’t you?

    I’m not suggesting they fire Schiano although they probably will.

    But whatever they do, and whoever’s in charge of doing that, needs to work on totally reversing the culture because what they got now, ain’t workin’.

  7. Donny C…

    Still not sure, man.

    They’re locked into him so they’ll have to negotiate some sort of contract buy-out, which would make three consecutive coaches (him, Rah and Gruden) that they still had to pay well after they were canned.

    They have plenty of capable (and I used that word cautiously) coaches either in the office or on the sidelines in Wannstedt and Butch Davis but I doubt even those guys could clean up this mess.

    It’s okay though. We’ll still beat the Dolphins next Monday night. Wish you were here, honey.

  8. Al…

    I just figured if they were going to win a game, last night’s would be the one but clearly, I was mistaken.

    I didn’t realize exactly how bad, and how unmotivated, this team actually is. At least I don’t feel bad about sleeping through most of their games this season.

    55 games for Oden, Al? I’ll take the under.

  9. Dwin…

    I agree with both points. I haven’t heard anyone say a kind word about Schiano since he’s been here and it’s getting worse by the week.

    Here’s the thing though. If the Glazers sell the team, or even if they don’t, what’s the guarantee they even stay in Tampa Bay?

    Think about it. We could legitimately lose our baseball team and our football team in ten years.

  10. Doesn’t Buccaneer actually translate to “bad” in some form of latin?

    Besides that one fluke year with Gruden, they’ve been pretty consistent in that area.

    I’m sure you still have that old brown paper bag headwear in the attic…Might be time to fish it out again.

  11. It was a bad night for those who don’t care about hockey. The Lightning played one of the most classic games I’ve ever watched them play. The night in Tampa was just as thrilling as the night the Buccaneers won the Super Bowl. But only at the Tampa Bay Time Forum.

  12. Is there something in the water down there. Remember the Runner-up-Bowl? The one that Lombardi dispised and eventually made Rozelle 86 it. I say bring it back and have The Sunshine State Bowl featuring the powerhouseJags and Bucs. Seriously, those are ugly products. I don’t blame the Buc fans for staying home. Good excuse anyway.

  13. The city of tampa has a airtight lease with the Bucs. There is zero chance of the Bucs moving anytime soon

  14. Bleed…

    I wasn’t lyin’. There was a guy I saw at the stadium that night with a bag over his head.

    Or maybe that was an ex-girlfriend. Always so hard to tell.

  15. Bets…

    Tampa’s a party town. I honestly expected a little better of a turnout for a Thursday night game.

    I guess the product they’ve been putting on the field sucks so bad these days that nobody wanted to watch.

    Can’t say I blame them. That was blinding.

    We’ll see what happens in a few Mondays.

  16. DJ…

    Airtight, huh?

    Just ask the people of Cleveland or Baltimore if they believe in ‘airtight leases.’

    You don’t actually believe that if the Glazers presented a legitimate case for picking this team up and moving to the commissioner’s office, that he wouldn’t sign off on it, do you?

  17. Sumbitch.. those pathetic weak ass Tampa Bay Buccaneers actually won their first game?? Wow.

    … against another weak ass Florida team!!?? LOL.

    Sorry Chris, but at least you got one W.

    Had to sign on just to share with you…

    LOL… pathetic itself… LOL

    good luck next week

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