The Stevie Ray Vaughn rule is as such. In 1990, I was in New Orleans for their annual Jazz & Heritage Festival. Lacking funds, I opted not to go the final day of the concert. Stevie Ray Vaughn was the headliner. He died in a helicopter crash three months later.
These are regrets in life I’d rather not have.
The same can be said with wagers. If you have a hunch, it’s often best to just go with it as long as you’re wagering wisely and responsibly.
The following gut-punch of a story tells of a hunch not carried through with, a wager not placed and two underdogs that would have paid… well, you’ll just wait to find out how much to share in the agony.
Let’s let the pain simmer a little bit, shall we?
Early Saturday afternoon, I messaged my current gambling partner in crime, Dr. Milhouse. We had a decent weekend betting the NFL two Sundays so we had some coin to spare.
On a whim, I looked up what Ronda Rousey’s opponent was getting as an underdog. The line on Holly Holm was coming back at +1000, which means ten times your money.
Milhouse scoffed at the idea.
“No chance,” he wrote back, in response to my suggestion. “It’ll be over in the first.”
Now, I wasn’t looking to put crazy money on the fight but when I see 10 to 1 odds, I like to take a shot, even if it’s for small change.
Here’s my thinking.
First off, I had heard that Holm was a boxer. She was also undefeated. But beside all that, ten to one tells me that if Rousey fought this woman ten times, she would beat her ten times. This, ladies and gentlemen, is how I like to make my money. That’s why they play the games, right?
So I didn’t push the idea, thinking perhaps, Milhouse was right and my money was better saved for a wager far more likely to hit.
Now, I was busy at work and hadn’t done much research on that football game. I didn’t even know where it was being played. Here’s what I did know. That game could have gone two ways. LSU was either going to destroy Arkansas and exact revenge for the beat down they took to the hands of Alabama last week, or they would have been so distraught by that loss that they laid an egg entirely.
My quick response to Milhouse was this… and read carefully.
I replied “Only if I can parlay it with the fight”
For you gambling newbies, a parlay is when you bet two teams together. You increase your payout but both teams have to win.
In this case, they did.
Milhouse never replied but this is a wager I would have probably bet about five dollars on just to have some action, just for shits and giggles, just to see what it would have paid out if it hit.
Milhouse didn’t place the wager.
By my calculations, the wager Arkansas-Holly Holm parlay to win would have paid out nearly 35 to 1. That minimal five dollar bet would have paid out $175!
At about 12:54 am, while I’m knee deep in customers shouting my name and demanding whiskey, I received another text, this one all in caps.
OH. MY. GOD.
ROUSEY GOT KNOCKED THE FUCK OUT.
I felt sick to my stomach.
And so it goes.
I’ve written about wagers won. I’ve written about wagers lost. Perhaps the most painful of all are the winning wagers not placed.
The cursed Stevie Ray Vaughn rule.
Those who taught me how to gamble taught me well. With a limited bankroll, you don’t have to bet that much money to win big. You can find an underdog or two you believe in, bet ‘em, and if they hit, well not only are you walking to the window to collect, but you can boast about how you called it all along.
So there ya’ go. I called it. And in some small way, this is my $175 worth.
Let it be known, I don’t (entirely) blame the unplaced wager on Milhouse. The experienced gambler would tell me to open my own fucking account and stop relying on others to squash my hunches.
I kept the TV off that night when I got home. I didn’t turn on SportsCenter as I usually do, knowing they’d lead with the Rousey story then go straight to the LSU loss.
I’d rather not relive it and just forget it ever happened.
Next time around, Milhouse will probably place that wager. Until then, drinks are on him.