#AskJameis campaign teaches lesson in cruelty and other ill-advised Twitter forum ideas

Twitter Jameis

Florida State University and its Heisman Trophy winning quarterback, Jameis Winston, recently realized that Twitter can have more of a bite than Shark Week. In keeping with the 21st century, someone in charge of the Florida State athletic brain trust Continue reading

A house party I’d rather not attend

bieber2

I recently celebrated a birthday.  Somewhat surprisingly Johnny Manziel did not attend the festivities.  Apparently he didn’t get the memo. There was once a time where many of us reveled in the opportunity to meet famous people.  Some of us Continue reading

A fight that would never happen… but should it: Rousey-Mayweather

rousey mayweather

Let’s suspend reality for a brief moment. Let’s pretend we live in an indecent world with no rules or boundaries, you know, the kind of world in which Ray Rice and so many other professional football players live.  It’s a Continue reading

Chumpservations, Vol. 30: Phone books, sneaker pimps, oddball gratuities and the world’s most famous Heimlich

chumpservations new height

Phony I came home the other morning to find a phone book sitting on my front door step.  They’ve gotten considerably smaller over the years. I grew up in New York City.  Back then, we had three separate phone books Continue reading

Modern Athletes I Would Want On My Side If A Bar Fight Broke Out

I’ve worked in the bar industry for quite some time.  Every once in a while, one drunken sot at the bar takes offense to the way another drunken sot at the bar is looking at him and shit goes down.  Continue reading

Chumpservations, Vol. 29: Tweets, death threats, fake penises, chicken mcnuggets and dookie chains

Remember the old joke about the guy who walks into the doctor’s office and says “Hey, Doc. It hurts when I do this,” only to have the doctor advise him to simply stop doing it?  Apparently, Darrelle Revis isn’t familiar Continue reading