Archive for the ‘Life of Sports Chump’ Category

Tales from the Hard Rock, Vols. 1 and 2

February 4th, 2012 by Chris Humpherys

This post goes to show that lightning can strike twice… if you’re lucky enough.

Months ago, I was going to write a feel-good story about friendship, gambling and how SportsChump finally got the better end of a woman scorned.  (Hey, it only took 43 years, right?)

My birthday fell back in July.  I was blessed to be surrounded by family and friends who all came to share the love.  The drinks were flowin’, the food was a-plenty and the karaoke was abundant and atonal.

After a long night’s work, my partner in karaoke crime, Pure Prairie Dave, and I hit the local Hard Rock for a deliciously fattening, chicken-fried steak breakfast and a few hands of Let It Ride poker.  His inebriated wife-to-be came along for the ride.

We debated whether or not to take her, knowing either choice would ultimately be the wrong one.   Gambling is a time-consuming activity.  Had she not accompanied us, his phone would have been ringing off the hook with her angrily awaiting his return home.  Had she come with, which she did, she would have also complained… which she did.

After a solid hour or so of celebratory morning champagne and the inevitable ebbs and flows of the poker table, our chip stacks were hovering around even, give or take our bar tab.  His fiancée lay not-so-pleasantly asleep in the car.

She approached the table minutes later, still tipsy from the karaoke-fest hours earlier and demanded to be taken home.  I don’t mean to imply that she caused a scene but let’s just say car keys were flung halfway across the casino floor.

Recognizing the urgency of the matter, Pure Prairie Dave decided it was best to call it a night.  I understood, having been there myself on occasion.  As the happy couple bid the table a fond farewell and stumbled towards the exit, I stayed at the table to press my luck.

Now, for those of you who have never played Let It Ride, the game is actually quite simple.  Each player is dealt three cards face down.  The objective is to land a winning hand with the assistance of the communal flop.  A pair of tens is the lowest winning hand and pays even money.  Better hands obviously pay a higher multiplier on your original bet.  There are five bets, two of which you can pull back at your leisure as the hand progresses.

Well, the very next hand, I was dealt pocket tens, so I knew I already had a winner before the dealer’s flop.  In the distance, I could see the loving couple stumble out the casino door.  As the game suggests, I let it ride.

The next card came.  Another ten.  Trips and I was good to go, knowing a fourth ten would pay huge with the amount of chips I had bet that hand.

The fourth ten hit and so did I, to the tune of over a grand.  Happy be me!

Well, the same thing happened again last Wednesday, with the same loving couple after another night of karaoke bliss.  This time, Mrs. Pure Prairie Dave sat at the table, playing alongside us and learning the game as she went.

The night, er… morning was going well, with all of us breaking even until… straight flush (9-10-J of clubs) in the pocket and an off-suited 7 and 8 on the flop, making SportsChump the big winner in the casino once again.

Now, of course, I don’t condone gambling outside of someone’s limits, always know your bankroll, but Let It Ride is a great way to kill time if you have a couple hundred bucks to spare.  The payback can be huge.  Just know what you’re doing.

It also helps to have a little luck on your side.

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Six surefire ways to fix the Orlando Magic

February 1st, 2012 by Chris Humpherys

“I’m mad as hell, and I’m not going to take this anymore!”

-Peter Finch as Howard Beale in Network

 

That’s it.  I’m fed up!

I have been a die-hard Orlando Magic fan for years, supporting the team through thick and thin… but these days, even I have seen enough. Read the rest of this entry »

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Counterpoint: An American football fan talks Tampa Bay Buccaneers, the Glazer family and ownership in professional sport

January 24th, 2012 by Chris Humpherys

At the end of every NFL season, only one fan base is truly happy, leaving 31 others to wallow in the memory of what could have been.  Those feelings are compounded exponentially if you root for a team which never had a chance to begin with. Read the rest of this entry »

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Thoughts from AFC/NFC Championship Weekend complete with updated contest standings

January 23rd, 2012 by Chris Humpherys

Wow, what a Sunday of football! Read the rest of this entry »

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Second Annual NFL Playoff and Super Bowl Pick Em Contest

January 18th, 2012 by Chris Humpherys

We had so much fun with this contest last year that we’re hosting it again in 2012.

Plus I like giving stuff away. Read the rest of this entry »

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Holding Court, Vol. 1: Our NBA Round Table

January 17th, 2012 by Chris Humpherys

When the mastermind behind the Full Court Pest: 94 Feet of Tenacious Blog Sense first confronted me about contributing to his No Drama Hoops roundtable, I couldn’t have been more excited.  Read the rest of this entry »

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Magic fans brace themselves for second departure of Shaquille

January 11th, 2012 by Chris Humpherys

I remember exactly where I was when I first heard Shaquille O’Neal was leaving Orlando.  Read the rest of this entry »

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A Blogosphere Q&A… with me? Ballhyped interviews their Sports Blogger of the Year

January 6th, 2012 by Chris Humpherys

BALLHYPED: Chris, first of all, congrats on winning the 2011 Sports Blog of the Year Tournament. How’s that new crown fit? Read the rest of this entry »

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SportsChump named Sports Blog of the Year: A video celebration!!!

January 3rd, 2012 by Chris Humpherys

“I’ve taken my bows, and my curtain calls. You brought me fame and fortune and everything that goes with it. I thank you all.”

- Freddie Mercury Read the rest of this entry »

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Where NFL contest ends, NBA contest begins. Our futures recap, winner and NBA picks for 2011-12

January 2nd, 2012 by Chris Humpherys

There’s nothing like free swag, right?

Well, after his uncanny prognosticative abilities, someone here will soon be sporting some brand, new SportsChump gear, while bragging to his friends, family and the entire blogosphere that he knows more about football than the rest of us… Read the rest of this entry »

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