Chumpservations, Vol. 16 Wishful Thinking Edition: Randy Couture takes out Brett Favre, Roger Goodell AND fantasy football

UFC sells out

Did anyone else find last weekend’s Randy Couture-James Toney match gimmicky and contrived?  We’ve come to expect that from professional boxing these days but not from Mixed Martial Arts.  Why would Dana White feel the need to stoop to that level?  Couture is 47.  James Toney is fat.  Mixed Martial Arts doesn’t need boxing’s retreads to get by, does it?  What’s next?  Kimbo Slice versus Mike Tyson?  Or how about Couture against the entire cast of The Expendables. Wait, I’d actually pay to see that.  Maybe White is right on the money after all.  Is there any way we can get Bud Selig into the mix?

Blacking out fantasy football

Does anyone else agree that fantasy football might actually be BAD for the NFL?  If I hear one more person tell me who they stole in the eighth round of their fantasy draft, I might just throw up on their shoe.

Hear me out.  I’m planning on conducting a little experiment this season and you should too.

Whenever you overhear someone talking about the NFL’s slate of games on any particular weekend, tally the amount of times they talk about the outcome of the actual game against how often they mention how many fantasy points Adrian Peterson earned them by scoring three touchdowns.  Anyone care to wager you’ll hear more about the latter?

While no publicity is bad publicity and Roger Goodell has to be happy that the NFL still reigns supreme, I think accentuating the accomplishments of a single player, particularly when it has more to do with a fictitious team rather than the team he actually plays for, is inherently wrong.  We’re getting dangerously close to the point where fantasy football is more important than football itself!

And speaking of bad for football, when is the commissioner going to rescind the league’s television blackout rule?  So far this pre-season, the first two Buccaneer home games have been blacked out for failure to fill the stadium.  Well, what if I’m working?  What if it’s raining?  What if I’m too broke to afford a nine dollar beer just like everybody else?  If Josh Freeman throws an interception and nobody’s there to watch, did it really happen?

Again, I can’t help but think that preventing fans from watching their favorite team unless a certain amount of the local population can afford a ticket, is bad for business.

Ailing Minnesota

With the injuries to Percy Harvin and Sidney Rice, does anyone else think that Brett Favre might be rethinking his decision to return for a ‘final’ season?  (Yeah, and Jason: The Final Chapter was the last Friday the 13th movie!)

The Vikings play their first four road games at New Orleans, Green Bay, New York and New England and that DOESN’T include home games against the Dolphins and Cowboys.  Why do I have the feeling that a sub-.500 start will treat us to some good old-fashioned locker room dissension and more of the same old waffling?

Favre has worked his magic before but it will be considerably more difficult this season without his favorite targets at full health.  Harvin still suffers from periodic migraines, Rice is out for the half the season after hip surgery and Greg Camarillo doesn’t exactly strike fear into the hearts of opposing defenses.  That beat-up Mississippi lawnmower might start looking awfully good by Week Six.

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30 Replies to “Chumpservations, Vol. 16 Wishful Thinking Edition: Randy Couture takes out Brett Favre, Roger Goodell AND fantasy football”

  1. I have a life, so I don’t have time for watching real football and playing fantasy football.
    I have mixed feelings about the Bucs being blacked out this year. It will spare me the pain of watching 5 or 6 losses, but on the other hand my wife will miss out on watching me jumping up and cussing at the television.
    Great minds do think alike. I made the same comment about how Favre may be rethinking his decision to come back, although I hope Percy has a great year.

  2. That UFC fight was in Boston, my technical home town, and it was the first big MMA fight held there, so the whole thing was overdone. Tom Brady showing up sporting his mandals and quaffy haircut, Shaq tooting his TV show horn while hinting at the fact he might put in 10 minutes a game for The Green this year. It was more of a media event to get people into the sport. The actual “legit”-ness (3rd word I’ve made up so far) of the fights was questionable at best.

    As for fantasy football, speaking ill of the game is looked down upon and may your team suffer the fate worse than a Bronco fan that drafted Tim Tebow because he can “do it all”. I love it because, like many, I’m in a league with guys I went to college with that are now spread out all over the country and sadly the time I talk to them the most either on the phone or via angry swear-laden emails is on Monday mornings after our matchups.

  3. Cheese…

    Thanks, man. I think you just proved my point about that fight. I didn’t realize there was such star power at the event.

    By the way, who’s fatter? Shaq or Toney?

    And re: fantasy football, Cheese, I’m all for the camaraderie it brings among friends, as well as the trash-talking, but don’t NFL games do that on their own?

  4. Brady is fatter, he just hides it under his hair.

    Unless you grew up in a rivalry, and not all teams are constantly going through good rivalry periods, then just following your home team for the sake of being your home team can get boring, especially if they suck. Fantasy can really get people into the game and maybe introduce them to new teams. The only downside I see with fantasy sports in relation to football itself is that it warps the importance of less fantasy relevant players. Sure you can name off every RB and top 3 WRs in almost every team’s depth chart, but hell if you can explain what a nickel defense is or name a linebacker. On top of that every fantasy player thinks his home team needs a stud RB to win a super bowl because his team won his league championship with Peterson. Fantasy can give you roster dpeth but it seems to take away from actual game knowledge.

  5. Yaz…

    Let me put it to you in terms you might more easily understand.

    It’s kind of like poker night at Bill’s minus the whiskey but with a similar amount of blood-letting.

    The only other difference of note is that in mixed martial arts, both competitors wear tights whereas at Bill’s it’s generally only Puckett who does so.

  6. Stopped playing FF a few ago and I enjoy the actual games a lot more. Only thing I miss is the trash talking.

    If you are in a league without chatter during the week or trash talking it’s just a waste of time.

    The blackout rule is probably here to stay and it’s going to be a national story this season. There will be quite a few cities affected…including KC and San Diego.

  7. Your argument, Cheese, for fantasy football is duly noted. I knew I’d be in the minority on this.

    Although I still feel my Bucs winning or losing should hold more importance to me emotionally than my fantasy football team… unless of course there’s money on it.

    We haven’t even discussed the fact that F.F. is essentially legalized gambling.

    Personally, I’d rather join an elimination league where I pick the weekly winners rather than have to pay attention to which one of my tight ends has a bum ankle and is a game-time decision.

  8. Chris

    Did anyone truly believe that a lard ass like James Toney stood a chance against Couture ? Toney may think of himself as one of the baddest men on the planet . But on what planet that might be who knows ?

    Brett’s mama says that her son is a really good man and that we should all stop hating on him. Personally I won’t hate on Brett just as long as he doesn’t come of looking like a primadona athlete ! Ah well too late ’cause he’s already that anyway !

    US men’s tennis has now become an oxymoron. Roddick blames his loss on fatigue and the fact that his form hasn’t been all that great. Screw that less time in the bedroom with his swimsuit model wife and he might’ve actually won two more games in his second round match . But then again have you seen Brookyln Decker ?

    Click on the above link to see a montage of pics of the Victoria’s Secret model Brooklyn Decker. It’ll make you feel good about your present plight …… or not .


    Alan …… 🙂

  9. In the most shallowest of ways, I care more if my fantasy team wins sometimes*. I’m not saying I’m lining up to be the next great GM of anything or that winning at FF relates to real life at all, but what impact (besides my monetary contributions) do I, as a fan, have on my NFL team winning? Do I get any reward besides a parade, a pump in ticket price next year or the chance to sport my “Patriots Super Bowl 2001” shirt for a decade? For people that literally do research (I’m talking ignore the wife/paid ‘friend’ for hours and hours on end) it may be more rewarding to them to walk away with a couple hundred bucks and the bragging rights among their friends instead of just having the satisfaction of watching your team on TV win and celebrate.

    *Team comes first THEN fantasy, but if the Pats are 6-8 on the year and me winning $500 rests on Mark Sanchez needing to throw 2 TDs, well then you throw those damn TDs you over-rated SOB.

  10. Drew…

    If you’re going to place an actual wager on the game, it’s tough enough to handicap it properly to make any money, never mind select an entire lineup for the team and hope you win.

    I thought about playing this year in a $100 league, as you suggested, only to be able to talk with some friends every so often.

    But I’d always end up in leagues where nobody would ever trade… or worse yet, I’d start Clinton Portis on a week when he’d get no touchdowns while my backup RB would run rampant.

  11. Al…

    I don’t even know why Toney would attempt something like that. You knew it would only be a matter of time before Couture went for the tackle and the fight would be over.

    I’ve read some blogs lately that try to compare which are better athletes, martial artists or boxers. I didn’t realize that argument was actually raging. A more important argument is who ages more gracefully. And how about Couture’s ear, huh? Damn!

    What else can be said about Roddick that hasn’t already been said. Bounced from the Open already? Was he even ranked? And if so, why would he be ranked in the next tournament he enters? I’m still waiting for the next great American (male) tennis player. Unfortunately, I have a feeling I’ll be waiting a long time.

  12. C’mon, Jon. You’re a Pats and Sox fan, right?

    You can’t tell me that anything replaced the joy of watching the Sox and Pats win their first titles in your lifetime.

  13. Impressive that you give my Fins some respect!! Regardless of the prevalent obsession with fantasy football, you’ll still find the MAJORITY of those players still bleed their team colors.

  14. Chris

    There are but a few real athletes in MMA . All are in the lighter divisions for anyone who truly knows anything about the sport. But I can honestly say that if the fight ‘tween Couture and Toney was gimmicky. Then how’d you describe the current heavyweight scene in boxing ? If that’s not a complet farce then what is ?

    If Toney had lost an extra 15-20 lbs off his frame the end result would still have been the same. Some idiot commented on the fact that former heavyweight champion Ray Mercer beat a former UFC champion . Well considering who Mercer beat at the time it should be no surprise. Even the guys in the NFL who’ve tried their hand in at MMA within UFC haven’t exactly proven to be a monumental success . As for Kimbo that was sheer hype and not much else ! Just because you’re beating the sh_t out of some guy in Miami it don’t mean sh_t once you’re in the octagon as he so aptly found out.

    Delonte West joins the Celtics . So does that mean Shaq’s mom gets to be in the pecking order of women who Delonte will “nail” who are matriarchs of the players on that Celtics’ team ? To be a mother of a player on that Celtics’ team. They’ll be lining up at TD Banknorth Gardens just to see what the fuss was all about and Gloria James will be pis_ed by it all .

    tophatal …….

  15. No fantasy trophy will ever replace ’04. Bodily fluids still fly out of every orifice when I watch those DVDs. But fantasy can compliment the reality nicely. FF is huge right now, the bubble will eventually burst and the NFL will have to think of some new toy to get people to watch besides creating rules to favor the offense.

  16. The last couple years has made me happy that the Raiders weren’t on to see them get blown out or have to watch that horrible offense. I guess I’d rather watch that than some of the games they put on though.

    As for fantasy sports, I feel like it was a lot more fun when there was less information out there. I had a lot more fun picking those “sleepers”, and felt it reflected your knowledge of the sport a lot more. Now there’s 5 million websites telling you who to pick when. I guess I like fantasy baseball and basketball more… Football is pretty much a crapshoot hoping your guys stay healthy…

    Favre has 20 million reasons to not regret coming back haha!

  17. Donny C….

    First of all, thanks for the Cowboys-Fish updates tonight while I was at work.

    One thing I will say, as I was writing this post is , you did come to mind.

    As someone who bleeds the teal and who doesn’t partake in fantasy football unless forced to, it just seems to me that rooting for your team will always supersede pulling for players you drafted out of a hat.

  18. Chris

    Fantasy sports and all that goes with it . Well it’s essentially like trying to sugges that one’s an expert in picking stocks and they know what to look for. Well it ain’t as easy at looks with stocks and the losses when they come about can be catastrophic if you’ve made a mistake. With any of these fantasy sports you lose nothing tangible at all.

    Who by your estimation will be the first coaching casualty in the NFL ? I’m going with Del Rio of the Jaguars with Smith of the Bears a close second.

    There’s A Price To Pay And It’s Always Steep …….

    Have a great Labor Day Weekend and my regards to you and the immediate family ! Stay safe and take care man !

    tophatal …….. 🙂

  19. I don’t think there’s any comparison between boxing and MMA these days, Al. That’s why I said we expect that sort of gimmickry from boxing but not MMA. I mean, isn’t Evander Holyfield still fighting?

    But I will say this. I do think for the major bouts, boxing still outdraws. Only problem is… boxing has no major bouts. So why bother, huh?

    And how many roster spots do the Celtics have left? Don’t they have about 20 guys now… all over the age of 35?

  20. Chap…

    All I can say is last year, unless there were a REALLY huge regular season game on, I would still tune in to see the Bucs play.

    Maybe that’s because the Bucs always play at 1 pm and most of the other, more watchable games are not in that time slot.

  21. Yeah, in all honesty I’d rather watch my team too. There really aren’t all that many BIG games during the regular season… BTW, I think you are still in the lead on the caption contest haha!

  22. Chris

    Roddick as his name would suggest is something of a di_k to begin with !

    Holyfield now holds a little recognized version of the heavyweight title. Something called the WBIF title ? Personally I’d rather see him get knocked on his ass by the women he still owes child support and alimony to !

    Somone’s mama on the Celtics is gonna get her booty tapped by Delonte’ .

    Members of AARP are said to be jealous of what’s happening on the Celtics roster . They believe it be age discriminatory and who can blame them .

    Casualties Of War Or Just Simple Stupidity ?

    tophatal ……. 🙂

  23. I don’t know if that’s the case with Roddick, Al, but he certainly does suck at tennis. Maybe it’s just bad luck that he came along the same time as Federer but it’s safe to say most still think he underachieved over his career.

    Another heavyweight title, huh, Al. That sport gets more and more disorganized by the day. Kind of like the Florida Gators offense without Tim Tebow. A total clusterf*ck.

    And I think the word is out in the NBA. Keep Delonte away from your momma.

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