Biker dude cowers to pit bull puppy and what that has to do with sports

I was scrolling through my television channels on another insomnia-ridden night and stumbled upon something intriguing.

It was a clip of some big, tattooed biker guy, trembling and weeping hysterically at the thought of petting a four-month old, pit bull puppy.   The video below is an excerpt from Animal Planet’s newest project “Extreme Animal Phobia.”


Don’t get me wrong, I’m not clowning on the guy.  Manta rays, water moccasins and pretty much anything bigger than me that bites, scare me absolutely shitless.  But it got me thinking how some phobias might pertain to the current world of sports and entertainment.

For your perusal, I have compiled a Scary Biker Dude to Pit Bull Puppy phobia translation chart for 2011.  Feel free to add your submissions below.

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36 Replies to “Biker dude cowers to pit bull puppy and what that has to do with sports”

  1. You’ve got that right, especially the last example. The GOP field looks like the last graduating class at Clown College.

  2. Snake…

    Like most friendly neighborhood pubs, I try to avoid talking politics or religion here at the Chump. I’m sure you’ve noticed.

    That being said, it’ll be interesting to see who the GOP sets up as their sacrificial lamb in 2012.

  3. By the way, I forgot to say that Marvin the biker is a total pussy. I don’t like pit bulls either, but shit man, its just a puppy. He’s a disgrace to shaved-headed bikers everywhere.

  4. As a kid I was terrified of rollercoasters, but never to the point of crying my eyeballs out of my head.

    Sounds like the owners and players are starting to have a little common sense. Too bad they have one huge obstacle being money….

    Speaking of Tiger did you see his new place with the practice facilities in his back yard?

  5. Chap…

    Have you been on a roller coaster since? You’re missing out, dude.

    My fingers are still crossed for the NBA.

    And where’s Tiger’s place? Orlando?

  6. Snake…

    I hear the tattoo parlor in Columbus that was laundering all Ohio State paraphernalia for drugs and ink is now hiring.

    A judge just sentenced the owner to three years in the slam.

    Must’ve been a Michigan fan.

  7. Ozzie Osborne…..Legalization of drugs

    Chris Berman……Long term contracts

    Gene Simmons……Plastic surgeon plug

    Reggie Bush…….Canton, Ohio

    Johnny Paycheck signature song(TTJob&ShoveIt)…Ark coach Petrino.

  8. X Factor’s latest betting line

    Melanie 3
    Drew R 7/2
    JoshK 7
    SFrancis 12
    ChrisR 13
    MCanty 14
    RCrow 15
    LBell 17
    Hogzz 25
    “Astro” 25
    Intensty 30
    LRayne 30

  9. RB…

    I think Oz gets a lifetime exemption. I mean, who would he be if he wasn’t using?

    And is Reggie allowed anywhere near Heismanville? I do believe Timmy Tebow’s an honorary mayor with Archie Griffin being the all-time king. (I’d alienate all my Buckeye readers if I didn’t mention his name).

    Your mere mention of Johnny Paycheck made me wonder what Hank Williams, Jr. is doing right now.

  10. Chris

    The girlfriend is rifling through some clothes for Halloween . I inferred that she could go the Kim K route as she has the ass for it . I’ll be the runaway slave ……. named Kunta Kinte’ .

    So Goodell has refused the DOD’s (Dept of Defense) request for the games of last weekend ? They want to use it as a form of interrogation for the detainees in Guantanamo Bay , Cuba . Personally when the NFL is subjecting the fans to crap like a 12-7 game between the Jags and Raven , Brown Seahawks, Raiders /Chiefs . I’d view that as a form of cruel and unusual punishment ! So why not use it on the detainees down in Cuba as a device and form of interrogation ?

    And you were wondering why the viewership spiked for the World Series ? Take a look at what MLB was up against at the time on NBC and then rest of the broadcast outlets ?

    tophatal …………

  11. After the idiocy of the letting loose of those exotic animals nothing absolutely nothing at all surprises me at all anymore !

    I hear La Russa now has an endorsement contract with T Mobile ?

    tophatal ………..

  12. Chris,

    Must take advantage of appeasement time with the old lady. Inside info? These show producers sometimes make Vince McMahon smile.

  13. Al…

    You gotta hand it to both teams.

    It’s been a wild series and of course the Mike and Mikes and Tim Kurkjians and all the rest of ESPN is calling last night the greatest game ever.

    Why am I not surprised?

  14. Chris

    I don’t know about the greatest game ever because I’m sure that there have been comparable ones in the World Series ! But that’s the typical hyperbole you should come to expect from the idiots within ESPN !

    Can we now all agree that the Cowboys season and that team has gone up in a cloud of smoke ? 34-7 and there was nothing that suggested to me that the team knew what hit them ! As for Skip Bayless and his suggestion that Romo is a great qb with leadership skills . That’s like suggesting that Muammar Ghadafi was a great leader for the country of Libya . Bayless should shut the ___ck up and in essence become a mute !

    Yep T-Mobile ! Well now that AT&T will be taking them over wait to see your charges rise .

    tophatal …………..

  15. Not a great week if you’re TO ! No one comes to see his workouts in Calabasas , Ca,. . Probably because everyone is probably playing spot the Kardashian including his agent Drew Rosenhaus . And then to top it all his reality show gets shuttered down permanently by VH1 . That should’ve been done after the very first episode .

    tophatal ……..

  16. Chris

    So La Russa has stepped down as the manager of the Cardinals ? Heir apparent Mark McGwire gets the job do you think ?

    If that happens then where does that leave Pujols ? I mean it’s not as if McGwire can teach the Cardinals’ first baseman anything about hitting, is there ? I mean what the hell ?

    Lose Yourself ….

    tophatal ………….

  17. Well, Al, we knew that NFC East was going to be a tough division. It always is.

    I’m not sure how many, if any, wild card spots will come out of that division, but as we’ve discussed, we should have at least one from the NFC South and very possibly one out of the North.

    That doesn’t bode well for any of the East teams that don’t plan on winning that division. It’s getting awfully close to put up or shut up time for Philly, New York and Dallas.

    And somewhere Wade Phillips is laughing.

  18. Al…

    Who is this T.O. of which you speak?

    As you can see, I’m about as interested in Terrell Owens as the rest of America and the 32 teams in the NFL.

    Unless he wants to do an interview for the website. Then again, I don’t know if I want to take the hit in traffic.

  19. Chap…

    I’ve pitched and putted in my backyard before. Can’t say it looked anything like that though.

    Although it might have helped me this year. I had as many tour victories as Tiger did.

  20. Al…

    No way McGwire gets that gig. He still carries too much baggage. And after all, wasn’t this only his first year as hitting coach?

    I here Oquendo is likely to get the job.

  21. Ten mil on the wedding, Al. That’s a little too rich for my tastes.

    Besides, we both know I’m not the marrying type.

    I definitely wouldn’t go out like my namesake however.

    I’ll have my thoughts up on the break-up soon, so stay tuned.

  22. Chris

    TO will end up with a team I can assure you of that ! Someone will take a flier on him at some point between now and the trade deadline and for signing free agents .

    You’re not the marrying kind if the prenup was right I bet my last dollar you wouldn’t be saying that ! You get the chance to smack that @@s and walk away with a coo $million ? What’s not to like ?

    Do you by any chance ever listen to local radio station WILD94.1 ? Former Bucs’ quarterback Shaun King made an appearance on O’s (Orlando) morning show (7am-10am) wherein he states that Andrew Luck is overrated and won’t amount to much in the NFL . Beyond a lone postseason appearance with the Bucs did King really achieve that much over the course of his NFL career ?

    So McCourt relents and he agrees to sell the Dodgers ? How his a_s isn’t in jail is beyond me , considering his and that of the front office and their actions . He wasn’t the only one to have profited personally from the alleged misdeeds that took place . I seriously doubt that the team’s creditors will recoup much more than 60 cents on the dollar in terms of what they were said to be owed .

    Into The West But For God’s Sake Not The AFC West Or The NL West For That Matter …….. !


    tophatal …….

  23. Al…

    I’m not so sure I agree with your take on T.O.

    Do you honestly think a team making a playoff run will take a chance on having his presence in the clubhouse? He’s been nothing but a distraction everywhere he goes.

    Re: Humpdashian, other than a broken heart, did he lose or profit from the whole deal? I can tell you that I’M starting to get a lot more name recognition from the whole deal, which is pretty damn funny. I mean, I was already famous in my own mind.

    Funny that Shaun King should be talking about ANYONE’S NFL career like that but no, Al, I didn’t hear that interview. You know I don’t wake up that early.

    I’m catching up on my reading today so I’ll be over to check out your latest. Also looking forward to J-Dub’s weekly McCourt update.

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