Your weekly caption contest celebrates fictional characters and relief pitchers

It’s obvious to anyone who’s ever laid eyes upon San Francisco Giants reliever Brian Wilson that he clearly marches to the beat of a different drummer.

Say what you will about the guy, when healthy, he is one of the game’s most dominant closers, largely responsible for bringing the first ever World Series to San Francisco in 2010.

Whether his act is genuine, shtick or somewhere in between, Wilson‘s image consultant makes Dennis Rodman’s look tame by comparison.  Wait, Wilson does have an image consultant, doesn’t he?

Seen below, Wilson attended last Wednesday’s ESPYs in Los Angeles alongside Sasquatch, the mascot for Jack Links beef jerky.  Why are we not surprised?

So, to celebrate all that hair, I thought I’d host a caption contest in Wilson’s honor.   The winner of this week’s contest will receive one disposable razor, some shampoo and a free stick of beef jerky.


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32 Replies to “Your weekly caption contest celebrates fictional characters and relief pitchers”

  1. Pingback: Your weekly caption contest celebrates fictional characters and relief pitchers - BallHyped, MLB | BallHyped Sports Blogs

  2. The ESPYs red carpet was a regular who’s who of A-list celebrities. Like in this Sasquatch / Brian Wilson picture, where you genuinely can’t tell who is who.

  3. OK. You got me. I’m Cat Stevens aka Yusuf Islam. And you sir, need to do some manscaping.

  4. 666…

    Why do I suddenly have this image of you in a tux, at the ESPY’s, standing alongside Joan Rivers as she relentlessly tries to set you up with her daughter.

  5. Snake…

    Our shared bald genes obviously doesn’t run in the Sasquatch family.

    Maybe Orlando could trade Dwight for Sasquatch straight up.

    Or better yet… Teen Wolf.

  6. We know that Teen Wolf can dunk. But even he wouldn’t want to play for a lottery team.

  7. I totally forgot about “Harry and the Hendersons,” Dwin.

    So Lithgow goes from Shakespeare in the Park and serious films like “The World According to Garp” to acting alongside Big Foot.

    Hope he got paid handsomely for that one.

  8. Star relief pitcher welcomes back Giants slugger after his return from a fifty game suspension for testing positive for steroids.

  9. Yea, this post has taken a dramatic turn for the worse.

    I thought the photo might lead to a healthy conversation about baseball and the evolution of the closer. Instead I have Dubs and Snake talking man-scaping.

    I have only myself to blame.

  10. Aer…

    Nicely done, sir.

    A subtle shot at Barry Bonds. I’m impressed.

    I guess that means Sasquatch is not a first ballot Hall-of-Famer in your eyes.

  11. After years of frustration Sasquach is relieved to finally find someone that doesn’t mess with him.

  12. Ya see, Goose, I actually take Brian Wilson as someone who WOULD probably mess with Sasquatch, perhaps drink one too many funnels late one night and puke all over his futon.

  13. So I have a decision to make , one the two individuals was said to be an unwilling participant in a proposed sex tape that involve the youngest of the Kardashian sisters ? What will their mom think of next to for that additional 15 minutes of fame ?

    Ichiro to the Yankees ? All of a sudden the Rays season on the face of it things don’t look that bad at all . But on the other hand , the Rays are still the Rays .

    Up next, the latest on Dwight Howard ……… he’s now called in an interior designer to redesign the room that holds his bidet . He doesn’t like the the look of the room especially when he’s got to himself in the mirror and take a pi$s sitting down .

    tophatal ……………..

  14. So how is it, Al, that the Yankees land Ichiro Suzuki to help their playoff push and the Rays are stuck with a 38-year old Hideki Matsui who’s batting .147?

    And saying that about Dwight Howard, Al, is an insult to the WNBA and all those female players who are actually committed to their craft and their teams, whereas Dwight, is most certainly not.

  15. Fear THIS beard Sasquatch!! I’m a baseball freak so I like when you do baseball posts, but really can’t get past the man-scaping in this one. I’m LOL over here…

    Did you remember that Brian Wilson was in the taco bell commercials? Well, he may be a fantastic closer, but along with the Fear The Beard, Wilson will always forever be known to me as bringing “Inner deliciousness” to my vocabulary for a variety of things…
    DeeDee’s dreaming of Fenway : 59 days to go 😉

  16. Good call, D.

    I totally forgot about those commercials. He was really good in them, leading me to believe the man will have a successful career after baseball.

    Have fun in Fenway! And you may want to bring a coat.

  17. Chris

    Ichiro will is due $18 million in salary this season , however the Yankees upon this trade are only committed to paying $2.5 million of the contract for the remainder of the year . Kind of reminds me of the A Rod trade from the Rangers to the Yankees . At the time the player was three years in on his very first $250 million contract signing . The Yankees only had to foot 35% of the remaining seven years while the Rangers were left on the hook for the remaining 65% of that contract .

    And you’re of the belief that baseball has its finances check ?

    I responded to your comment concerning the NFC West . You overlooked the fact that the Niners signed , Mario Manningham, Brandon Jacobs and Randy Moss as well as the draft choices made to bolster an already terrific defense and an improving offense . Ten wins for the year is on the low side for the team , and that is in spite of their schedule for 2012 ,

    tophatal ……………………

  18. Al…

    I’m of the belief that whatever the Yankees want, the Yankees get.

    The Rays certainly could have coughed up $2.5 mil for a shot at Ichiro, after all, base hits are exactly what they need. But this Ichiro move was so clandestine, even the so-called experts at ESPN had no idea it was coming.

    Oh, how I love when they get scooped.

    Ten wins is low for the Niners this year, huh?

    Well, I didn’t believe in them last year so why should I start now? What does them proving me wrong all season and into the post-season have anything to do with it, he he?

  19. They had no idea it was coming ? Ichiro demanded a trade .

    Sony CEO & President Howard Stringer says it was a sad loss for the Mariners . As the parent company of SEGA and the majority stakeholder in the baseball franchise they’ve simply used the Mariners continually as a tax write off and not much else . Stringer earns in excess $25 million a year not including incentives but he’s talking about this being a sad day for the Mariners ? WTF !

    Did you overlook the fact that the Niners added , Moss, Mario Manningham and Brandon Jacobs during the off-season ? Never mind the draft picks from this past NFL Draft .

    The Niners should waltz through the NFC West this season .

    tophatal ………………

  20. Pingback: Your weekly caption contest celebrates fictional characters and relief pitchers | The Sports Blitz

  21. Al…

    Now that A-Rod has a broken hand, that Ichiro singing will come in handy.

    And regarding injuries, I still haven’t given up hope on this Rays team. If Longoria can get healthy soon, he could provide the spark this team needs to make a late push.

    So Ozzie shipped out Ramirez, huh? I wonder who got the better end of that deal.

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