Back from the dead #priorities

TGHI just spent a rather gruesome week in the hospital.  I won’t bore you with the gory details of how many needles I had stuck in me.  Let’s just say I was given more shots than I sell on your ordinary Saturday night in my fancy little Ybor City bar.  The staff at Tampa General was as pleasant and as caring as possible.  They felt my pain and dare I say felt bad about how many times they had to chase me around my hospital room with a needle in their hands. I started looking like a heroin addict.

Anyway, this explains why some of you haven’t heard from me in a while, and I apologize but now I’m back with what I’d like to think is a site that brings into discussion some very important life lessons, or at least makes you laugh and think in the process.

In my time of dying, I missed my website, I missed the form of self-expression, I missed you guys.  Ironically do you want to know what I missed the least?


While down and out, I’d check my phone, more to catch up with friends and damn do I have some fabulous friends.  You guys do complete me, to go all Jerry Maguire on you.  Either way, thanks for reading my mission statement.

You complete me

I logged on to ESPN once just to check a Gator basketball score (yes, they still suck) and yes, I watched the dunk contest.  But I checked the internet again to peruse and didn’t miss it one damn bit.

Zip.  Zilch.  Nada.

Now I can bore you with the sappy lines about what’s truly important in life but these days sports have morphed into something entirely different. ESPN even managed to sportify the passing of Stuart Scott.  Shameful.

I guess what I’m trying to say is… thank you, I think.  These last few days have made me realize what’s truly important and it’s not any final score but rather the scorecard of our lives.  Yes, I’ve my missed my laptop to write about the silly shit we see from day to day but half the time I write about sports, I’m writing about the stupid shit athletes do. Don’t get me wrong, running this humble little diary of a website has kept me and hopefully you entertained for six glorious years but moving forward, sports might not hold quite the dear place in my heart that it’s always held.

BruceYou must be thinking I’m crazy, not exactly Bruce Jenner-crazy but at least somewhat off-kilter nonetheless.

Oh Christopher, you’re just having football withdrawals.

And you might be right.  I may be crazy, but it just may be a lunatic you’re looking for.

But ya’ know what?

After nearly seeing my life flash before my eyes, balls and the people that play with them just don’t hold the same meaning.

Wanna know what I did with my mother the other night?

SNL 40

It was Sunday night.  The NBA All-Star Game was on.  I hadn’t missed one in years.  Instead we watched SNL’s 40th anniversary special, through which I cried the entire 3 ½ hours.  Yes, I caught game highlights to see Russell Westbrook prove he’s the best player on the planet not named LeBron James.

But it wasn’t a priority.

Who am I kidding?  If games are on, I’m still gonna watch, maybe even obsess but certainly not prioritize.

So join me, won’t you as I begin an entirely new life, scoreboard reading 0-0.  I plan on scoring a lot of points in this game show called life.  So buckle up as I plan on putting up points in the W column pretty damn quickly.

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24 Replies to “Back from the dead #priorities”

  1. I am glad you are ok Chris. I understand completely how you feel. The day I had kids, sports lost its luster and became way less important to me. I didn’t realize the chump blog has been around for 6 years. Congratulations, that is a great accomplishment. I appreciate what you do and like sharing my opinions here. SNL was amazing to watch, so many memories. I am glad you are back!

  2. Hi Chris, I’m so sorry you’ve been down and out lately. I hope you’re feeling like you’re ready to get back in the game and come out swinging (no pun intended) by doing what makes you happy, whether that’s entertaining all of us with your witty and unique take on the sport world or just sitting back and enjoying life. Whatever it may end up being know we are in your corner. Your insightful and often sarcastic take on what’s happening in sports have made an impact and will be remembered and laughed about by us for years to come. Hang in there Sports Chump. Rick and I are rooting for you. (also no pun intended) 😉

  3. A welcome return ! Missed you a great deal, but glad to know you’re back and gearing to mount back up on the saddle . Sports’ wise , same old stores , just a different say and same set of ongoing problems.

    A Rod and Lance Armstrong still can’t find a way to stay out of the spotlight . Each in recent days have issues apologies for willfully misleading either their employers or a a corporate sponsor . Still can’t understand how some were still defending both of these morons when the evidence became undeniable . Jury duty be on the cards for them at some point in their future , if it hasn’t gone by already

    Tophatal …

  4. Glad to read you’re doing better, Chris. You’ve quickly returned to form with the pic of Belinda Jenner. And to make you feel younger than you feel, just know that at least one of your ardent readers watched the very first airing of Saturday Night Live…and it seems like it was just yesterday. Glad you’re back.

  5. Medessa…

    I love you guys tremendously.

    Let’s do something soon. I haven’t seen the family in forever.

    All you have to say is that Dindy is cooking and I’ll come running. I’ll get Dad to drive from his end to meet us too.


  6. Al…

    Lancy and A-Rod are egomaniacs to the highest degree.

    Think about it. Technically they’re both out of sports for good and they STILL can’t keep their names out of the papers.

  7. Belinda. I love it, Mark. We’ve seen some bizarre shit happen in the world of sports over the years but this story might take the cake. Not too much though because I’m watching my figure, he he.

    And I don’t think I watched that very first episode of SNL live (I would like to feed your finger tips to the wolverines) but I wasn’t watching all that long afterwards.

  8. Stat of the day. Does Linda Cohn have six toes, D? I’m not gonna ask how you know that.

    I dated a girl with webbed feet once. In fact, I think you may even remember her. How long have we been friends now?

    When Beave and I were living in the student ghetto, I was dating a girl named Rebecca. She had webbed toes.

    Gave all new meaning to the expression “Fuck a duck.”

  9. Chumpy,

    Take care of yourself and allow time to smell the roses when they next bloom. Those little things mean everything and sometimes it takes needles to remind you of that. I find that I like Dr. visits less and less with each passing year. And don’t get me started on insurance company scams.

    Seriously take as much care of yourself as you care to take. I’m not one to prescribe living in a ascetic vegan monk bubble simply to add a few more miserable years to my life. However that desire to eat a nice steak may indeed shorten my time and I have to deal with that too.

    Best of wishes

  10. My brother, Tree.

    Meeting you on the internet has made life just a little more glorious.

    As always, thanks for the kind words.

    Now how much longer til football season?

  11. Chump,

    If my rascally online impertinence has made your life even an iota more glorious then I’m well satisfied.

    Or disappointed. LOL.

    Football season can take it’s suhweeeet time coming around the corner since I get to enjoy that rare moment of basking in the sun as The National Champion until it does so. Gotta love me some Buckeyes!!

  12. Chris,
    I know you are OK now. Your mind is in full function mode. How do I know? I caught that Billy Joel line you threw out there.

  13. I am pretty sure you Live more life than most people I know…I can NOT wait to see what more you get UP to know. Glad you are doing better!

  14. Someone wants to play Linda Cohn in a movie ? So that’s the reason behind Bruce Jenner’s weird behavior as of late ? Unfortunately his current legal issues could preclude that all.

    Your thoughts on the NBA trades that took place ?

    Tophatal ………

  15. Just when we thought the Heat came out on top, Al, comes bad news of South Florida. Apparently the Heat may have lost Bosh for the rest of the season due some spots on his lungs.

    Best to him for a speedy recovery.

  16. Reflection is always good. Too bad we wait to get kicked in the ass most of the time to realize it.

    Glad you made it…Now start writing about the spoiled dipshits that get paid millions to keep the rest of us entertained.

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