Just as people were ranting and raving about how offensive it was that Kentucky’s Andrew Harrison, a black man, dropped an N-bomb on live TV when referring to Wisconsin’s Andrew Kaminsky, a white man, this Easter Sunday, Twitter offered up something far more offensive… and hysterical.
God bless the internet. Literally.
Some creative kook decided to come up with the hashtag “Jesus Pick-Up Lines.” For his efforts, he probably has a one way ticket downstairs reserved in his name. Either way, considering I’m a full-time heathen working in a bar who hears cheesy pick-up lines all the time, I found this string of Tweets laugh out loud funny.
So enjoy the post and try not to get too offended while reading. Remember, if God didn’t have a sense of humor, he wouldn’t have invented the smile. Oh, and if you don’t know what a hashtag is… this might help.
Aye girl. I was lookin through the book of numbers when I realized I didn’t have yours. #JesusPickUpLines
“Don’t worry, it doesn’t always take me three days to ‘rise’ to the occasion.”
The Last Supper isn’t the only thing I’ll be eating tonight. #JesusPickUpLines
I haven’t been nailed in like, 3 days. #JesusPickUpLines
#JesusPickUpLines: “You up for a night of rapture and perhaps a second coming?
“I’ve got nine inches, and I don’t mean the nails.” #JesusPickUpLines
Are you ready to accept the body of Christ? #JesusPickUpLines
When I saw you on Tinder I swiped righteous
I’m a Messiah in the streets and Satan in the sheets. #JesusPickUpLines
Hello there, stranger from another manger #JesusPickUpLines
Noticed you’re wearing a cross. Funny story actually…
I’m really thorny right now #JesusPickUpLines
It’s not easy hauling around such a big piece of wood. #JesusPickUpLines
#JesusPickUpLines I put the “stud” in bible study.
#JesusPickUpLines see these abs? crossfit.
You a walking dead fan? #JesusPickUpLines
My dad owns this place #JesusPickUpLines