Does anybody remember here John Manziel?

“This is the end.  My only friend, the end.”

–          Jim Morrison, The Doors

I came home from a hectic night’s work last Saturday and immediately took to Twitter.  Johnny Manziel had been released by the Cleveland Browns earlier that afternoon and I wanted to see how the world was reacting to the news.  After all, Johnny Football’s lightning rod cult of personality had already taken up too much of our time so I figured Twitter would have something interesting to say about his dismissal.

When I logged on, however, I found something surprising.  Johnny Manziel was no longer trending.  I have to admit I was a little disappointed.  With no more Johnny talk, what in the world am I gonna write about?!?

Milli Vanilli grammySure, when the news of his release first broke, Twitter went haywire with some totally tasteless Tweets (listed below, don’t worry).  That’s how Tweeters roll.  But apparently John John has lost his staying power.  His fifteen minutes might just finally be up.  Could it be that Johnny Football has now gone by the way of Vanilla Ice, Milli Vanilli and parachute pants?  It was so much fun while it lasted.

Back in the day (okay, only like a month ago) I could work a 12-hour shift and the guy would still be trending after doing another something stupid.  It looks like that’s no longer the case.  I guess poking fun at John John isn’t fashionable anymore.  Or maybe we’ve just run out of jokes.

Either way, I sure am gonna miss it.

So, to honor the life and times of Johnny Manziel, I give you the best “Johnny Got Cut” Tweets as Cleveland’s once and former savior sulks off into the sunset, his head hung low with only the sound of empty beer bottles clanging at his feet.



Duke Chanabhan ‏@authenticduke

Johnny Manziel should be able to party and go to clubs as much as he wants now that Browns cut him.


B. Miller ‏@BlaiseInKC

Johnny Manziel needs to go to a team that needs a rumming quarterback.


The Fake ESPN ‏@TheFakeESPN

“I didn’t even know I was on the Browns.” – Johnny Manziel’s reaction when being cut


NOTSportsCenter™ ‏@NOTSportsCenter

Highlights from the Johnny Manziel era with the Browns:



McNeil ‏@Reflog_18

We would like to recognize @JManziel2 for his participation as a member of the Cleveland Browns organization.

CdSBEQmWIAE-p88.jpg large


Andy Ruther ‏@AndyRuther

Johnny Manziel has been cut by the Browns. He’s expected to be signed by an A&M frat flag football team by the weekend.


Eric Bartlett ‏@eb1212

REPORT: Texas Department of Corrections Signs Johnny Manziel To 3 to 5 Years


Cowboy Hank ‏@medic9269

Johnny Manziel was released by the Browns last week, marking the first time he’s ever been released without bail being posted first.


Andrew Smart ‏@smartandrew51

Johnny Manziel should sign with the Eagles. They seem to enjoy overpaying for college stars that haven’t accomplished anything in the pros.


ʞıʇdoɹǝqıɥd ‏@phiberoptik

When Johnny Manziel said he would “Wreck this league.” he was actually talking about his career. #byByeJohnny



Jordan Eller ‏@JordanEller

Really excited to see where Johnny Manziel ends up next. My guess is either Dancing with the Stars or Celebrity Big Brother.


dadpression ‏@Dadpression

The toughest part about the Browns releasing Johnny Manziel is that his parents have to find a new daycare


Tommy! ‏@TeflonTommy2

The guy trying to sell $7,000 Johnny Manziel merch on EBay isn’t having a good day.


ChrisHumpherys ‏@SportsChump

Do you know how bad you have to be to be the worst Cleveland Browns quarterback ever? #JohnnyManziel


Mike McDonald ‏@MikeMcDonaldHa

Just got Johnny Manziel signed to cut my lawn this summer … Paying him in vodka



Dave Steele ‏@LucidSpin

I would definitely want to build my team around Johnny Manziel. If my team were a college team. In College Station. Several years ago…


R M ‏@rmin12

I see the @Browns released Johnny Manziel….but what about Billy?


Darrell Logan ‏@DarrellLogan

Dear Kaepernick,

I’m leaving you my wig & fake ID card in my old locker just in case you want out.

Good Luck,You’ll need it.

Johnny Manziel


Nick ‏@Quick_Nick2

So when’s this 30 for 30 for Johnny Manziel premiering?


Luis Rosales ‏@lrosales89

Ryan Leaf and Johnny Manziel walk into a bar .. Drink all the alcohol. Bar closes.


Jeff Carroll ‏@jeffcarroll

Had no idea Johnny Manziel was starring in the Ryan Leaf reboot.


nathan timmel ‏@nathantimmel

Thousands are killed while driving drunk every year, and yet #JohnnyManziel hasn’t been one of them yet.  #NoJustice


Rob Woodyard ‏@robwoodyard1

If there is a rap version of Engelbert Humperdink’s “Please Release Me” you can bet #JohnnyManziel is listening to it right now


chuck finley ‏@Austin_Jon

Over under on Johnny manziel coke arrest 3 weeks


Don ‏@DontheBiker

I am personally offering Johnny Manziel $87.13 per month to play for the Houston Texans.



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13 Replies to “Does anybody remember here John Manziel?”

  1. WOW. Thats a great post. Loved your thoughts SC but those tweets are hysterical. Enjoyable read & most remarkable considering your crazy long hours at your other job! Always impressive & most creative. Enjoyed it, thx SC.

  2. MoS…

    This is just another case of an athlete given an opportunity and not taking full advantage of it.

    Despite his personal problems, I don’t think anyone out there feels sorry for the guy.

    Hence the tasteless Tweets, he he.

  3. And so ends the career of another could have been promising athlete who was too immature to handle adult life. He doesn’t even have a degree to fall back on. Credit for that goes to the so called Walker Rule which allows players to become eligible for the draft before completing their college eligibility.

    (And yes, I know 4 years of college doesn’t always improve your maturity or guarantee that you actually mastered that degree you were awarded at graduation. Case in point Gabe Rivera.)

  4. I think most of us agree, Beag, or at least those of us who have never been in the position to leave school early for millions of dollars, that the degree is the way to go.

    I can’t necessarily say I fault kids for coming out early for a shot at money… as long as they understand the consequences.

    Clearly this kid never had a) any role models to look up to and b) enough sense of his own to realize what he’s pissing away.

    I wanna know where Kevin Sumlin comes into play in all this.

  5. I spent two years teaching at Texas Tech, and I was always fielding calls from athletic department academic compliance officers asking if I could add “just a few more points” to a player’s GPA (I didn’t, and fortunately, I had supervising professors that backed me 110%). The only coaches I had any respect for were Marsha Sharp and Bob Knight. Both of them treated their players as students first and athletes second. If I ever had a problem with one of their players, all I had to do was call. Coach Knight even escorted one of his players to my class because the young man had difficulties getting to class on his own.

    The athlete as “God” atmosphere is even more prevalent at A&M. I am sure that Sumlin, Kliff Kingsbury, and the rest of the Aggie athletic department all had a role to play in this debacle.

  6. All of the hype and the bull$hit , simply wasn’t worth it ! Why the hell was there even an interest taken in this @sshole to begin with ? Just what the world of professional sports needs , another abuser , misogynist and mental fu#k-up (Johnny Manziel) . Now you have the idiots within the Browns’ front office claiming they were duped and misled by the Aggies’ coaching and Athletics Department ?

    The NFL is filled with crass and dumb @ssholes at the top of its hierarchy , its union and the front offices of the franchises operating in the league. To top it all we also have ambivalent stupidity lapping up the hype like their being fed a good five-course meal.

  7. When a guy files to trademark the name Johnny Football before he’s played a single game in the NFL, you should know it’s not going to end well. Entitled, egotistical, etc. Never thought he would make it in the NFL, now just hope he makes it in life. Goodbye Johnny – it’s like we never knew you.

  8. That’s a pretty sweet story, Beag.

    I didn’t know any of that but it doesn’t surprise me one bit.

    I just heard that Manziel has signed Drew Rosenhaus as his agent which means this circus might only be beginning.

  9. First of all, Al, the kid is like 5’11”. And unless he’s the second coming of Russell Wilson, I just never saw it panning out. It’s not like Heisman Trophies are any sort of guarantee of success in the NFL.

    Just ask Tim Tebow.

  10. Well, Moose, I think Anthony David trademarked the “unibrow” and that worked out okay for him.

    That’s because the kid has his shit together and could actually play.

    He wasn’t drunk every damn afternoon like John John.

  11. Tim Tebow’s Heisman is probably being used as a door-stopper (door jam) in his home.

    Big things come in small packages ?

    Johnny Manziel ……….. makes a piece of turd (fecal matter) seem like the odor from a bunch of freshly cut roses wonderful. How the hell did anyone believe this kid was good enough to play in the league , never mind the fact Browns’ owner Jimmy Haslam and the former GM Ray Farmer believed they had been lied to by the Aggies’ coaching staff and Athletics Department concerning Manziel’s off the field issues ? Didn’t these @ssholes actually use due diligence concerning his being drafted let alone their checking his background themselves ? If you’re going by the Wonderlic Test , game film and the NFL Combine alone , then it just goes to show how out of touch these executives are , as well as the league in general .

    Johnny Manziel’s off the field issues in college, were well-known and had been chronicled in print. Did anyone ask how fast Manziel could drink a ’40’ ?

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