Ladies and gentlemen, participants from around the globe, in only one week of “gambling” on football, you have helped me prove my point.
Gamblin’ ain’t easy. If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times. There’s a good reason there are so many casinos in Las Vegas.
Seven people entered the opening week of my first annual $100 giveaway. Only ONE of us ended up with positive points and she’s a NASCAR fan who’s never officially wagered on football in her life.
Surprised, not surprised.
This means it’s still anybody’s ball game, including people who haven’t yet entered so get your entries in and tell all your friends that $100 of my money can be theirs just by proving they’re luckier, er… know more about football than anyone else.
Please allow me to remind you of the rules of this contest. Each week, you must choose five games based on the point spreads I’ve listed below. You must assign them confidence points, five to the one you’re most confident about, one to the game you’re least confident about.
If you predict correctly and your team comes out a winner, you earn those points. If you do not, those points will be subtracted from your weekly score.
Here are the standings to date:
SpeedBeagle +1
KP 0
Heavy D -1
Hank M -1
Ryan Meehan -1
Dr. Milhouse -2
SportsChump -11
In case of a push, such as the Giants minus one last week (Final score: Giants 21, Cowboys 20), I have decided to neither add nor subtract points but rather give a neutral zero.
The show must go on. Tell your friends. All they need to do is pick games correctly and be leading by season’s end. Remember, participants MUST play at least ten weeks to qualify.
Without further ado, here are Week Two’s NFL lines:
Jets (-1) at Bills
Titans (+6) at Lions
Chiefs (+2.5) at Houston
Dolphins (+6.5) at Patriots
Ravens (-6.5) at Browns
Bengals (+3) at Steelers
Cowboys (+3) at Redskins
Saints (+4.5) at Giants
49ers (+13) at Panthers
Buccaneers (+6.5) at Cardinals
Seahawks (-3.5) at Rams
Colts (+6) at Broncos
Falcons (+4.5) at Raiders
Jaguars (+3) at Chargers
Packers (-2.5) at Vikings
Eagles (+3) at Bears
I think some of these odds makers have been making frequent trips to Colorado. SF +13 over the Panthers? Are they serious?
5- Panthers beat the 49ers
4- Baltimore beats Cleveland
3- Titans cover the Lions
2- Vikings cover the Packers
1- New Orleans covers the Giants
Jets -1 over Bills
Dolphins +6.5 over Pats
Steelers +3 over Bengals
Packers -2.5 over Vikings
Cowboys+3 over Redskins
5—- Packers
4—- Seahawks
3—- Saints
2—- Raiders
1—- Eagles
Beag…
I know we’ve talked about this in the past but I just want to make sure you’re clear on betting lines. Clearly you are since you’re in the lead, he he.
When you say “Panthers beat the 49ers,” since the line is 13, that means the Panthers have to beat San Fran by more than 13 points.
So, by what you wrote, I have you picking…
CAR -13
BAL -6.5
TEN +6
MIN +2.5
NO +4.5
I just want to make sure I’m not taking those same trips to Colorado and that we’re on the same page as far as your picks go.
Kid Sheraton is in with his first entry of the season and just to make sure you know, sir, the Steelers are favored by three over the Bengals and not getting three.
So that’s what I have you down for.
I love the homer pick taking the six against New England. Let’s see if Kid Sheraton’s love for all things fish wins him money this season or leads to his demise.
Hanahan is also in. Welcome to the party, sir.
Did you bring a covered dish?
Sea -3.5 (5)
GB -2.5 (4)
Jax +3 (3)
Colts +6 (2)
Oak -4.5 (1)
The heaviest of all D is in, giving us nine participants on the year and four for the week.
Panthers won’t cover the spread so I’m taking SF in that one (5)
Everybody gives the Saints a free pass because Brees puts up fantasy numbers, but their defense eats a massive pile of cock. Giants cover (4)
I’m taking the Chiefs to win. Texans looked good last week but the Bears are awful. And the game being in Houston doesn’t mean shit per last year’s Wild Card blowout. (3)
The Steelers are probably going to win the fucking Super Bowl, and do you really trust Marvin Lewis? PIT covers (2)
The Patriots are far from the offensive powerhouse at home that they are with Tom Brady, but I’ll take six and a half against the Dolphins because Miami looked decent last week but they are average or below and average or below teams get beat by a touchdown or more when they are playing perennial Super Bowl contenders. Not a lot of faith in this (1) but that’s why it’s (1)
All that said, there appear to be a lot of trap games this week. This shit IS getting difficult.
Meehan
(5) – Jaguars (+3)
(4) – Packers (-2.5)
(3) – Seahawks (-3.5)
(2) – Cardinals (-6.5)
(1) – Saints (+4.5)
-kp
5- Baltimore – 6.5
4- GB -2.5
3- Seattle -3.5
2- TB + 6.5
1- PHILY +3
Mee…
You’re in, brother.
And damn right it’s difficult. Why do you think I set it up this way, he he.
Only the meek get pinched. The bold survive.
KP is in as well.
No faith in my Bucs, huh?
We’ll just see about that, sir.
Hank Mac is officially in as well, going all homer (as he should) to counter KP’s offensive Arizona covers pick.
I went a woeful -11 last week, meaning I’m the guy who throws his own party then throws UP all over my own sofa.
In an effort to redeem myself, I’m going…
PIT -3
SEA -3.5
IND +6
ATL +4.5
GB -2.5
… in that order.
5- Packers to cover
4- Seahawks to cover
3- Bears to cover
2- Cowboys plus the points
1- Steelers minutes the points
1. Panthers
2. Packers
3. Ravens
4. Seahawks
5. Eagles
Jaguars 5
Steelers 4
Saints 3
Houston 2
Eagles 1
Fibbs and Kathy F both made it in under the wire.
Stay tuned for Week Two rankings which should be coming to your directly.