I recently re-joined Reddit to promote my website. I originally joined the social media platform over twelve years ago for the very same reason: to drive internet traffic to the website you’re currently reading.
I eventually lost track of Reddit for a variety of reasons but largely because there are far too many people on that site with nothing better to do than police commentary that doesn’t jibe with their own.
Don’t believe me? Here’s proof. I recently stepped into a reddit spat… about mullets.
A week or so ago on a whim, I joked that only in Jacksonville could you find two quarterbacks with mullets fighting for the same position. First year Jaguars head coach and the ever-faint of heart, Urban Meyer, had just announced that Lawrence would be competing for the starting position with the mullet-ed Gardner Minshew. Minshew had become all the rage in 2019 when he took the starting job from Nick Foles. Minshew’s athleticism and unorthodox style of play turned heads and even won football games in Jacksonville, if only for a short while. He is, however, as anyone in Jacksonville will tell you, not the future of the franchise. That future belongs to Lawrence. Anyone with a modicum of common sense understands that Meyer’s preseason comments were nothing more than coach-speak, meant to light a fire under Lawrence’s ass.
Of course, Reddit users got their panties in a wad, most of them replying angrily that Lawrence’s haircut was definitely not a mullet, as if the hairstyles of those taking snaps in Jacksonville is far more important those who are actually taking snaps.
I say semantics. The fact that Lawrence is now playing in Northeast Florida (after playing college ball in South Carolina and being born in Tennessee) gives this a modern mullet feel for the 2020s. I’m not entirely sure you can’t Minsh-construe Sunshine’s golden flowing locks for a total Nineties throwback. Just because he hasn’t shaved the sides of his head (yet) doesn’t mean Lawrence’s coif can’t be jokingly mistaken as an homage to Minschew.
I know a mullet implies a “business up front, party in the back” lifestyle, meaning at first glance, from full frontal, a person’s hairstyle appears somewhat normal, until he turns his head only to find tufts of uncut hair.
Wikipedia, the internet’s source for all thing mullet-like, specifically defines the hairstyle as one “in which the hair is cut short at the front and sides, but is longer at the back.” Lawrence may not have his hair cut short up front but he is a Minshew-trim away from making that thing look like he’s a Duval County native. If we learned anything from Minshew Mania these last two seasons, it’s that he’s one influential dude. He took over the starting gig in Jacksonville and actually made them an exciting team to watch, all the while drawing comparisons to Napoleon Dynamite’s Uncle Rico, just as Trevor Lawrence has for years drawn comparisons to Remember the Titans’ Sunshine. If they want to officially pass the torch, the modified haircut might be the best publicity stunt ever.
Clearly my insinuation of two mulleted quarterbacks fighting for the starting position in a town that popularized the hairstyle was meant to be a joke. Who knew that our new era of political correctness now includes a sensitivity to mullets? As another man with an iconic haircut once preached, “Only in America!”
Lawrence’s hairstyle could never be mullet-mistaken especially when standing next to Minshew who’s mullet game is strong, even by Jacksonville’s standards. Of course, Lawrence doesn’t have a mullet… or does he? (I’m kidding. I don’t want any more fights. The last time a reader was this upset with me, it was because I insinuated Ken Griffey, Jr. may have dabbled in steroids since everyone else in that era had. I never heard the end of it.)
No matter how you trim it, Jacksonville is missing a golden opportunity to have their Goldilocked quarterback relate more to their fan base, a symbolic passing of the baton and hair clippers. Of course, it’s probably out of bounds for me to pick on a kid for his hair when a) he has plenty and b) I have none, however, he plays for the Jaguars and I consider that open season. Besides, the kid’s a national champion and an NFL quarterback. I’m pretty sure he has thick skin.