Akshay Bhatia and the Importance of Communication

Communication is the cornerstone of any successful relationship.

Not only talking but listening.

I’ve got this friend from whom I beg quality talk and yet, crickets.  This time around, it cost us both.

You know just who I’m talking about too.

The website around the corner in that nicer part of town, The Wife Hates Sports, is known for occasionally releasing bad football picks but also occasional golf winners.  Apparently, they have this system, a brain trust if you will, where my good friend Kevin puts numbers into a machine based on player data, weather conditions, putting surfaces, driving accuracy, greens in regulation and whatever golfers have had for lunch that afternoon to determine which of them will finish first.  Once he enters all these vital bits of data into his contraption, the newfangled machine spits out a list of potential winners, from favorites to longshots.  As I’ve followed his site since its inception, I can vouch for its somewhat occasional accuracy.

Weekly, I’ll ask him who I should wager on but fatherhood, a full-time job and his constantly questioning self-worth as a writer keep him from posting picks with SportsChump-like regularity. 

Now that sports gambling is legal in Florida, I’m prone to placing a few ill-advised wagers on PGA Tour events.  I can assure you, however, that the only thing worse than placing a wager on a loser… is not placing one on a winner.  Kevin can now vouch for that as well.

Last weekend, for some reason, my good friend Kevin was down in Savannah, Georgia, one of the last bastions of this country where sports gambling remains illegal.  While it’s routinely on the docket, as of right now, the good residents of Georgia are still denied their right to tease or parlay.  The Peach State will eventually follow suit into heathenhood but will be one of the last to do so.  Finding a place in this country that no longer accepts wagers is like running into an area with spotty cell phone service.  Can you hear me now?

As Kevin was down there, his golf futures machine remained at home churning out numbers.  At the Valero Open, it liked Akshay Bahtia.

Who?

While I lost money betting on guys like Max Homa and Jordan Spieth at the PGA Tour’s Masters tune up, I’m along the lot of you who’d never heard of Bahtia (and I even watch Full Swing!)  Bahtia is an American-born, popsicle stick of a golfer, a lefty who according to ESPN stands 6’1” and weighs 130 lbs.  He turned pro in 2019.  Valero was his second win on tour and while you’ve likely never heard of him, Kevin will never forget him.  In fact, for years to come, I may be able to rattle Kevin by simply texting “Bahtia” and have fun imagining him starting to convulse.  This is the kind of unplaced wager you don’t soon forget.

The point of the story is, I received a text Friday afternoon from Kevin explaining how he’d wanted to bet Bahtia but was unable to because of his location.  This unplaced wager left Kevin fruitlessly rooting for Bahtia to lose, yet Bahtia had taken a commanding lead.  He’d shot an opening round 63, 9 birdies, no bogies.  The only thing smoking more than his golf game was Kevin’s analytics… and his temper.

Like me, not one to bet huge stakes, Kevin would have easily dropped ten bucks on Bahtia this weekend, which means I would have too, not to mention sharing that information with my friends, who would have as well.  Bahtia was coming back sixty-to-one!

By now, you know where I’m going with this story.  While communication is key, so is taking the plunge when you know you have a winner.  Kevin had one.  And I’m no longer talking to him, which is unfortunate because it’s Masters week.

So, what have we learned from our tale of woe?  The first is to trust your instincts, as always within your bankroll.  Second is, to keep open lines of communication.  And lastly Georgia, while I blame Kevin, Kevin blames you.  Legalize sports gambling already.

Happy Masters Week, everyone and may all your wagers be winners!

Please follow and like us: